Fostering Friendships

Talk to your child about what they can do if they have a friend who is the one freaking out because they made a bad throw in the baseball game or have forgotten the words to a project they were suppose to recite in front of the class. At times, kids huddle around the kid who is upset and that makes it even worse. Instead, let them know that it is fine and just act normally. Though they could also think of a small gesture that might make their friend happy. They might say something like, “I will save you a seat at lunch.” or “See you on the bus later today.” If a child knows that their friend does not see a mistake as a big deal, they are more likely to give themselves a break too. Have you seen this one on taking the fear out of failure? Leave us your comments. Your feedback is greatly appreciated. Let us know what other topics you would like to have discussed. Share this post with your family and friends. Remember to always praise your child.

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Taking The Fear Out Of Failure

Your child may be fearful that you will not love them as much or be as proud of them if they mess up. Resist telling them the game or school play does not matter, which will invalidate their passions. Instead, you want to emphasize the message that you do not expect perfection, and while it does feel lousy to make a mistake, it is part of life and it will not affect how you feel about them. If they say that they do not want to be in that activity anymore because of a goof up, remind them of how much fun they had doing it and that they should hold on to those memories, rather than to dwell on one bad moment. Check out another post about learning from making mistakes. Leave us your comments. Your feedback is greatly appreciated. Let us know what other topics you would like to have discussed. Share this post with your family and friends. Remember to always praise your child.

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Learn From Experience Of Making Mistakes

Once your child’s initial hurt has subsided a bit, talk about how he got through it so he can cope with it a little better next time. You can ask, “Remember when you felt like this before? What did you do then?” You can also brainstorm together about different ways to avoid repeating the same mistake. This is what I did with my daughter, Jenna. She was in a school play and had forgotten a line. There was an uncomfortable silence and when Jenna had got backstage at the end of the show, she was so upset. Later, we came up with an idea that the audience probably would not even notice a missing line, so it is best to just keep going. She had put this strategy to the test a couple of months later. Jenna was performing in a different show and had some problems with her microphone, but instead of getting flustered, she covered it up beautifully. Making mistakes is part of growing up and how we handle them will help us grow. Leave us your comments. Your feedback is greatly appreciated. Let us know what other topics you would like to have discussed. Share this post with your family and friends. Remember to always praise your child.

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Rethink Giving Compliments

If you are constantly praising your child’s performance (“You really crushed that ball!”) rather than his effort (“I am impressed by how much you have practiced for your baseball games.”), mistakes will become harder for him to swallow. In a study at Stanford University a landmark research was conducted on kids’ resilience and persistence. One study was a test given to fifth graders that was designed for eighth graders. One of the groups was praised for their effort, while the other group was told how intelligent they are. The kids who got praised for their intelligence were upset about how hard the test was while the group given kudos for their efforts coped and performed better. They had realized how hard they worked mattered and not just focused on the end result. See our other posts on Making Mistakes. Leave us your comments. Your feedback is greatly appreciated. Let us know what other topics you would like to have discussed. Share this post with your family and friends. Remember to always praise your child.

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Getting Reconnected as a Family

Everyone wants their kids to be sort of busy. If you do not keep watch, they end up running around like crazy. That will just cause you to get into a giant gasoline bill and one exhausted family. Quiet time is definitely under rated. This can not be more true than it is in today’s world. Limit the kids to only picking one after school activity. Even then it can seem overwhelming at times. Also, keep play dates limited too. They see their friends all day at school. That is about 30 hours per week of socializing. Now throw in parties, playing with the neighbor kids and kids in your own family. There is tons of time for them to be socializing. Once they see that they can survive without a steady stream of play dates, you will not have to do as many. This will increase the quiet time that you have together. This children’s book shows the many differences in each family, The Family Book. Leave us your comments. Your feedback is greatly appreciated. Let us know what other topics you would like to have discussed. Share this post with your friends. Remember to always praise your child.

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Critical Information You Must Teach Your Child

4 Years-Old And Under

• Their first and last name. The first thing an employee will ask your child when they are lost.
• Your full name. If they only know you as “Mommy” or “Daddy,” you can not be paged by name.
• Do not go anywhere with, accept anything from or get into a car with anyone. Never without your permission, PERIOD!

5-7 Years Old

• Your cell phone number. You can be reunited more quickly if you get separated.
• A “safe list.” Instead of saying “Do not talk to strangers,” list 3 to 5 people who are always OK for your child to talk to.

8 Years Old and Up

• An easy to find meeting place. The more specific the location, the better if you do get separated.
• A buddy or a sibling to come along to places like a restroom that your child is starting to visit independently. There is more safety in numbers.
• To beware of grown ups asking for help and to never approach a car. Tell your child to yell loudly if anyone tries to make them go somewhere.

Check out this children’s book, Learning to Slow Down and Pay Attention.

Leave us your comments. Your feedback is greatly appreciated. Let us know what other topics you would like to have discussed. Share this post with your friends. Remember to always praise your child.

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15 More Things That Mean A Lot To Kids

1. Hold off with the tons of how was your day questions if your child comes home from school grumpy or tired. You can always get to that later, like at the dinner table.
2. Make up your own rituals and traditions. Taco Tuesday. Sunday afternoon bike ride. Picking apples in the fall.
3. Ask your kid to teach you how to do something for a change. And once you get the hang of it, be sure to tell him what a great teacher he is.
4. Let your child dress up to go to the grocery store. All month if she wants too.
5. Let your child overhear you saying something wonderful about her.
6. Stay up late to see the full moon.
7. Print their childhood photos so they have something wonderful to look at one day.
8. Don’t be in a hurry to tell your kids to go, they need to vent too.
9. Cook heart shaped pancakes for breakfast.
10. Crank up the music in the middle of homework and have a dance party.
11. Make a secret family handshake.
12. Hang a whiteboard in her room to leave messages for each other.
13. Start a pillow fight.
14. Share your old photos and letters when you were their age.
15. Thank your child when they do a chore on their own. Even if it is just hanging up a towel or refilling the water jug.

Check out this informative kids book, Understanding Myself.

Leave us your comments. Your feedback is greatly appreciated. Let us know what other topics you would like to have discussed. Share this post with your friends. Remember to always praise your child. See more things that mean a lot to kids.